Bottom Feeders: The Ass End of the ’80s, Part 11

Dave Steed June 11, 2008 19

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If you’ve got nothing to do on a Tuesday from 8 PM to midnight Eastern time, you should head on over to Bastard Radio and listen to Destiny’s Bastard Children, the Web radio show I’ve been cohosting for the last eight years or so. Known as Bastard #1 on the air, my cohosts Bastard #2 and Bastard #3 spin some nice college rock and wax poetic on plenty of topics.

I say this not simply for self-promotion, but because just a few weeks ago Bastard #2 pulled a great one off on #3 that seems fitting for this blog. Each week they play some of the bands that were listed in the Alternative Press “100 Bands You Need to Know in 2008” list. Bastard #3 sits behind the board and pops on the CDs, while #2 talks up the song about to be played. So #2 did his normal thing, #3 hit play and what comes on, but “Never Gonna Give You Up” by Rick Astley. I’ve been rickrolled on the web before but it’s the first time I’d heard of a radio rickroll. I have to give it up to whomever first started the rickroll, because this shit just never gets old.

How about some more “B” artists this week!

Bronski Beat
“Smalltown Boy” — 1984, #48 (download)

Bronski Beat ended up being a sounding board for gay issues. “Smalltown Boy” was about a gay child being shunned by his family, other singles were about prejudice against gay people and their album The Age of Consent printed those ages from different countries around the world on the sleeve. This song is memorable to me not only for the great synth rhythm but also for Jimmy Somerville’s unique vocals. Apparently he’s what’s called a “counter-tenor’’ which for some reason I had never heard of before. I learn something new every day I suppose.

Bros
“When Will I Be Famous?” — 1988, #83 (download)

I’m torn on this one. I want to hate it, but for some reason, I don’t. I think it has something to do with the chorus and the lyrics “when will I/will I be famous?/I can’t answer/I can’t answer that.” For reasons I can’t explain the fact that they can’t answer that is kind of weird to hear. I get the concept of the track, but it’s still kind of funky to me and that’s okay because I think it’s one of the more unique hooks of the decade. Seems like one of the “Bros” — Luke Goss — is now an actor and will be in Hellboy II coming out soon.

The Brothers Johnson
“Treasure” — 1980, #73 (download)
“The Real Thing” — 1981, #67 (download)

I love me some funk, but The Brothers Johnson just never did much for me. Their ‘70s output was significantly better than the few years in the ‘80s while they were still a band. I don’t like their vocals on the ballads like “Treasure” and “The Real Thing” was funk that wasn’t funky enough. You could argue that 1980’s “Stomp” was a decent track, but that’s about it from their last few records.

Alex Brown
“(Come On) Shout” — 1985, #76 (download)

Was the gimmick to this song the fact that when you see it on paper you immediately think it’s a cover of the classic Isley Brothers tune? It’s certainly not that, but it is a pretty catchy song from the Girls Just Wanna Have Fun soundtrack. I really can’t find any information on Alex Brown, but if you check out the video below, she looks a hell of a lot like a young Whitney Houston.

Bobby Brown
“Girlfriend” — 1986, #57 (download)

I tend to think that anyone that hasn’t followed Bobby Brown or New Edition throughout their careers either don’t know “Girlfriend” or his debut record King of Stage exist or at least forgot about it once Don’t Be Cruel came out. This is certainly closer to New Edition than his more memorable solo work but doesn’t even come close to what he did just two years later.

James Brown
“Gravity” — 1986, #93 (download)

I always get a chuckle when I hear this song. If this was anyone else I’d rip them apart, but I respect the Godfather enough to give him a pass on this. I don’t know whether Dan Hartman wrote this first and then just reworked it for the mega-hit “Living in America” or wrote “America” first and then this, but damn if they aren’t the same song.

Jocelyn Brown
“Somebody Else’s Guy” — 1984, #75 (download)

Jocelyn Brown was a studio vocalist and a background singer for a number of groups, such as Chic, Cerrone and even Right Said Fred in 1991. She released one album in the ‘80s on her own called One From the Heart and this was the only song from her to cross over from the dance chart to the Hot 100.

Peter Brown
“Stargazer” — 1980, #59 (download)

Brown had a few bigger hits in the ‘70s, but his best song was a single in 1984 — some little song he wrote called “Material Girl”.

Sam Brown
“Stop” — 1989, #65 (download)

The daughter of ‘60s star Joe Brown, she had a much better career in the U.K. and Australia. In the U.S. this was her only hit and it took a re-release of this track to actually get it to chart.

Jackson Browne
“For a Rocker” — 1984, #45 (download)
“In the Shape of a Heart” — 1986, #70 (download)

Jackson Browne is like the absolute middle ground of the ‘80s for me. I enjoy pretty much everything he did in the decade but I would never go out of my way to listen to him. I was actually kind of shocked to see he was in the RNR Hall of Fame. The guy only had two top 10 hits in his career, so on paper he looks like a pretty week candidate. There must be plenty about Browne that I just don’t know though, as it couldn’t just be the music that got him there.

Sharon Bryant
“Foolish Heart” — 1989, #91 (download)

I don’t think Sharon Bryant’s career went exactly the way she planned it. She started out as the lead singer for Atlantic Starr and had a decent run on the R&B charts with them in the early ‘80s. She then left for a solo career in 1984 and it took her five years to get a hit. Meanwhile, Atlantic Starr crossed over onto the Hot 100 with the mega hits “Secret Lovers” and “Always” and from ’85-’88 were one of the top R&B groups.

Peabo Bryson
“Let the Feeling Flow” — 1982, #42 (download)
“You’re Looking Like Love to Me” — 1983, #58 (download)
“Slow Dancin’” — 1984, #82 (download)
“Take No Prisoners (in the Game of Love)” — 1985, #78 (download)
“Without You” — 1988, #89 (download)

I have said the name Peabo Bryson more in the last three to four years than anyone else that doesn’t know him personally. I honestly don’t remember how we first got started on the Peabo Bryson kick because it’s not like we play that type of music, but Peabo became a favorite of my radio show and comes up in conversation at least every few weeks. Every now and again a picture of Peabo gets taped up in the studio and he watches over us. I think when we first started talking about my man Peabo, we were making fun of him, but now it’s pure admiration. There are two pieces of the DBC archive that we all love. The first is the one-off Ask Peabo/Ask Danzig segment. The other is one of the most requested outtakes in the history of the program. We were attempting to make some promos for the show and somehow I got in a very strange place and decided to make some clips as Peabo Bryson. Of course, up until he pitched some Time Life collection I actually had never heard him speak before and it turns out my approximation as to what he sounds like was a slight bit off. Even today I use way more bass than I really need to, well — just because. Peabo — Uncut & Unleashed is a gem that has never aired but needed to be posted. Just in case you are at work, or helping your child with her homework — this ain’t the cleanest of clips we’ve ever done so use caution.

Lindsey Buckingham
“Holiday Road” — 1983, #82 (download)

Not the greatest song that Buckingham has ever performed, but memorable since it was from one of the funniest movies ever made, National Lampoon’s Vacation. The soundtrack is a pretty tough find these days.

That’s it for the week. Next week, we finally finish off the the letter “B”! Woot.

  • WHarrisBullzEye

    I bought the Bros album when I was first realizing how much cooler the UK charts were than the US charts, as far as what bands were scoring Top 10 placings. I figured, hey, if they're tops in Britain, they must be worth buying! Well, granted, I still love “When Will I Be Famous,' but there's not much else on there that I really remember.

  • Jeff

    Oh, man, Bros. I remember buying the album Push on cassette when I was on a school trip to England back in '88 and listening to it over and over. I think I still have it lying around in my garage somewhere. If you could bet over the unnaturally high falsettos, there were some good songs on that one – When Will I be Famous?, Ten Out Of Ten, Love To Hate You.

    Okay, now I'm really going to have to go and dig that one out of the box in the garage. Just hope it still plays!

  • MichaelFortes

    Wow, that Peter Brown tune is actually pretty OK for a pop ballad… I had one of his LPs, the one with “Dance with Me.” I decided to just keep the 45 because that was the only decent song on it. I think Def Jeff sampled it for “Give it Here” if I'm remembering correctly. Had no idea that Peter wrote “Material Girl.” Love this feature, good stuff!

  • http://www.hemisphire.com hemisphire

    I never knew about “Holiday Road” until I saw he was performing it on his recent tour and I went out and found a copy. Now it's one of my favorite songs by him.

  • JonCummings

    I could go on for weeks about how much I love Sam Brown's “Stop” album, which is so unbelievably wonderful that I wore through two cassettes of it in 1988-89 before finally tracking down a CD. I would say it's the best white-girl soul album since “Dusty in Memphis,” and it hasn't been surpassed in the 20 years since (though Shelby Lynne has come fairly close).

    The “Stop” album was huge in England, and Sam has had a few other records that didn't get released here at all. She backed up Pink Floyd on their Division Bell tour, she's written with Maria McKee (a natural fit), a cover of “Stop!” was featured in the film of Bridget Jones' Diary, and she has a track on a Jools Holland album from last year.

    Other than that, I know relatively little about her–but I do know that if you ever come across a copy of “Stop!” you should buy it immediately.

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    Thanks Jon, I only own the 45 – so I'll have to track this down and see what you are raving about.

  • scrumble

    Sharon Bryant went on to reject the Jam & Lewis tracks that were given to Janet Jackson for the Control album … sadly, tasteful cover of solo Steve Perry didn't make up for it …

    Jackson Browne would be the quintessential Rolling Stone magazine artist that the R&RHOF was built for. These were middling '80s albums, though, but there wasn't much else for an artist of his vintage to do at the time except try. Then the Daryl Hannah assault charge tarnished that, too.

    Your underestimation of the week, from a critical pop history POV, is “Somebody Else's Guy” …

  • Breadalbane

    Jackson Browne also probably got some heavy “associated with cool and/or commercially huge acts” points from the R&RHOF voters:
    -He wrote a bunch of tunes for Nico's first album
    -He worked with the Eagles, co-writing their first big hit, stayed associated with them throughout their career
    - He championed Warren Zevon when nobody had ever heard of him, produced his first two Elektra albums, and kicked the Excitable Boy in the ass whenever he got lazy and didn't relase an album for a few years.

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    I'm listening if you care to explain the last statement – what critical part of pop history did Jocelyn Brown fill?

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    I gave it a nice spin on the way home from work today – overall it's not a bad little record.

  • Eric S.

    Holiday Road is really the only song that interested me in this week's post. I remember it from the movie, and I liked it well enough at the time that I bought the 45. I kind of forgot about it until buying the Vacation DVD and realizing that I'd never seen the song on CD. I was thrilled to see it was on his recently released concert CD/DVD, but he really needs a good “best of” with his solo and soundtrack work, along with some reworked Flletwood Mac

  • scrumble

    This would be the template for the soul dance diva that led to Whitney and Mariah. But more specifically British R&B a la Inner City and Soul II Soul. A lot of quirk packed into its four minutes uncommon for its time.

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    I think based on the small number of comments this week, that you're on to something…compared to some other weeks, this grouping of 20 or so doesn't have any song that's incredibly exciting on it's own. There's been worse, but much much better too.

  • V.C.

    Also, the pop charts don't tell the whole story. Jocelyn may have stiffed out on the pop charts, but “Somebody Else's Guy” was a MASSIVE hit on black radio (#2 on Billboard's soul charts). One of those classic summer hits that you really couldn't get away from (if you listened to soul radio, that is).

  • V.C.

    I think Jackson Browne got in the R&RHOF because HE WAS POPULAR. Sure, he may have only had two singles in the Top 10, but then again he wasn't really a singles artist. True Jackson Browne fans bought ALBUMS, and in the seventies and early eighties, FM stations played him religiously. He's probably still played in regular rotation on classic rock stations today. His Top 40 success was just incidental – you can't really judge him by that standard.

  • http://mulberrypanda96.blogspot.com rwcass

    It is a damn good song.

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