Bottom Feeders: The Ass End of the ’80s, Part 18

Dave Steed July 30, 2008 25

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So here’s my question of the week for you — what the hell is a “fancy dancer”?

I’ve been listening to a lot of ‘80s funk and R&B lately and I keep hearing that term pop up. There’s One Way’s “Pull Fancy Dancer/Pull,” Twennynine and Lenny White’s “Fancy Dancer,” and before those two there was the Commodores’ own song from 1976 called “Fancy Dancer.” I still don’t know what a fancy dancer is, though. I assume it’s someone who dances in a non-boring fashion — maybe a person who wears some attention-grabbing clothing or is simply superfly.

However, I do know that I’ve been talking about fancy dancers for the past three weeks now, and every time my unborn child starts kicking my wife, she calls him a fancy dancer. So it’s about time I figured out what the true definition is. Can anyone help? Better yet, were any of you a fancy dancer in the ’80s?

NEW MUSIC FOR THE COLLECTION:
Mai Tai, Mai Tai
Curtis Mayfield, Love Is the Place
House of Freaks, Tantilla

This week, an abbreviated edition centering on the letter “C,” as we continue wading through the muck at the bottom of the Billboard Hot 100 chart in the ’80s.

Petula Clark
“Natural Love” — 1982, #66 (download)

Also hitting #20 on the country charts, this was Clark’s 22nd and final Hot 100 hit.

Allan Clarke
“Slipstream” — 1980, #70 (download)

Allan Clarke was the lead singer of the Hollies for a good 90 percent of their career. He started releasing solo records in the early ‘70s but was never really able to muster any real hits on his own.

The Clash
“Should I Stay or Should I Go” — 1982, #45 (download)

The U.S. charts certainly don’t reflect the immense impact the Clash had on the music world. Twenty-two hits in the UK translated to just three in the States. But this is certainly one of those groups where charting singles really don’t tell the tale at all. I’m going to admit right here that I’m not a fan, and I think “Should I Stay or Should I Go” is actually a pretty weak song compared to tracks like “The Magnificent Seven” or “This Is Radio Clash.” And I’m also going to say that I liked Mick Jones better in Big Audio Dynamite. I know many of you are going to wonder what kind of crack I’m on, but hey, I’m just being honest here!

Merry Clayton
“Yes” — 1988, #45 (download)

Merry Clayton sang on “Gimme Shelter” with the Stones and background vocals on “Sweet Home Alabama.” Even though this was from the soundtrack to Dirty Dancing — a record that pretty much turned everything it touched into gold — “Yes” didn’t really get a lot of airplay.

Linda Clifford
“Red Light” — 1980, #41 (download)

A disco semi-star, her only ‘80s hit came from the soundtrack to Fame.

Climax Blues Band
“Gotta Have More Love” — 1980, #47 (download)

A shitty song from a shitty group, this is at least better than their massive follow-up “I Love You,” which supposedly even the band didn’t like.

Clocks
“She Looks a Lot Like You” — 1982, #67 (download)

In the context of this post, it’s hard not to like this song. In reality, it’s produced pretty poorly and has underdeveloped verses. This was Clocks’ only hit.

Club House
“Do It Again (Medley With Billie Jean)” — 1983, #75 (download)

It’s amazing how Steely Dan’s “Do It Again” and Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean” fit so well on top of each other. Curiously enough, the same two songs appeared mashed together just a little bit later by the group Slingshot.

Joyce Cobb
“Dig the Gold” — 1980, #42 (download)

This is such an incredibly bad song. If after listening to this you wish to hire Joyce to perform at a party, just visit her website. It’ll tell you more about her than I ever could.

QUICK HITS:
Best song — Clocks, “She Looks a Lot Like You”
Worst song — Joyce Cobb, “Dig the Gold”

Next week, we go back to a full-length post and meet some better artists, including my wife’s favorite of all time!

  • gary lucy

    I see a tag for Tiggi Clay, but not an entry. I've been trying to hear their sort-of hit again for years. I think it's called “Flashin'”? Do you really have that?

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    Ha, I took “Flashes” out of the post – but failed to remove the tag. My alphabatized list had them in “C” – but since they are a group – they actually belong in “T” – so I took it out. T's going to be a long time down the road.

    Here's a Bottom Feeders first – a bonus track!!

    “Flashes” – 1984, #86 (download)

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    I'll upload the song later tonight. Come back tomorrow morning Gary and it will be here for you – and in “T” – a year from now!

  • http://popdose.com MatthewBolin

    I don't need to wonder what type of crack you're on–I know: it's the stuff that comes in the bag that has a masking tape label written in magic marker that says

    “More 80s! More MOR funk! Minimal female lead singers!” ;)

  • JohnHughes

    Interesting week – look at how many of the featured songs just narrowly missed the Top 40.

    …so many shattered hopes and dreams…sniff…

  • http://www.bullz-eye.com DavidMedsker

    Wow. Listen to “Slipstream” after “The Air That I Breathe,” and try not to cry.

  • thefxc

    If you're on crack for preferring Mick Jones BAD to Mick Jones Clash, we must share a dealer. I think BAD is what the Clash would have sounded like had Joe let Mick get his complete funk on–and that's why I prefer BAD, heretic though I may be. Keep in mind that the first BAD single, “The Bottom Line”, carried the Def Jam label in the US–Mick had serious street cred.

    Other than the Clash, the only other song here that I remember is “Yes”, which my local radio station played to death. I was the only think I remotely liked about the whole Dirty Dancing shebang, so it's odd (to me) that it didn't become a bigger hit–it completely screams 1988; I can hear Paula Abdul singing it…

    Thank you again for contributing to my ongoing musical education.

  • gary lucy

    That is so nice–thanks a lot. Keep up the good work, look forward to the column every week

  • wags

    I actually have to agree with you about Do It Again and Billie Jean fitting together well… Love to know more of the story of why there are two versions of the mash-up and how either one of them went about getting authorization to do this since it seems like no new sounds were added here that didn't exist on one of the two originals…

  • sweetestbaboon

    Thought you might enjoy this bit of nascent anarchy in the form of my 8 year old son rockin' The Clash's “Should I Stay Or Should I Go?” at his recent birthday party/garage band gig.
    Here's the link to the YouTube goodness:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhqGbORQ23g

    If you do enjoy it, & deem it worthy, please feel more than free to embed at any & all blogs.
    I know Jack would be thrilled beyond belief!

    Thanks for all you do!

    Enjoy the day-
    Robt

    FEAR OF A JACK PLANET!

  • http://twostepcub.blogspot.com/ twostepcub

    Wow! I thought I was the only one here who even knew who Mai Tai was, let alone have it….I was a big fan of “Body And Soul” and “History”, and I've had the cassette of the album since the 80s, but recently tracked down a cd compilation online (yeah, I'm kinda nuts).

    I admit I'm much more partial to “Should I Stay or Should I Go”, as pure punk-pop as it is, though I can appreciate their older (and newer B.A.D.) stuff. But then again, “Yes” did nothin' for me, maybe cuz I'm looking at it as by the sensational voice on “Gimme Shelter”…

    Hope you liked the Nitzer Ebb from a couple back, it's been one of my faves since college.

    Again awesome (and not too short) column, Dave, from one of the other ones that troves the dollar bins (though I'm right across the river, I keep forgetting about Levittown – I usually end up in Princeton Record Exchange – my heaven on earth)

    And if I venture a wild guess – the wife's fave only will have one song on here, since everything else was a big hit of his…..in the land where a balding aging drummer can still be cool….

    ciao bello
    Ern

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    Ha. That's great. And you got all the kids to play something too! Tell Jack I look forward to rockin' out to one of his CD's in a few years.

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    I had the Mai Tai singles but hadn't been able to locate the album until recently. It's actually much better than I anticipated it being.

    The Nitzer Ebb was really not my thing. Because you brought it up though – I'm going to give it a second listen and see if I missed something the first time around. From what i understand, that's their best record – is that right? It's the only thing I own from them.

    Prex rocks. I only wish I lived a little closer – that would be at least a two hour drive for me. Okay once in a while – but I'm not doing that every day.

    What a guess!! That was just too easy. You got it right on.

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    I'd like to find out the story behind Slingshot – and even hear the song. I only own this one. I've heard various things – like the producer told Slingshot to do it because he thought they could put it together better….or that Slingshot actually was Club House under a different name. I can't find any info on Slingshot – and very little on Club House. The Slingshot record is one I've been looking for, for a long while now.

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    Yeah, yeah – very happy to do so. I remember “Yes” very well as well – and it's not like I watch the movie or listen to the soundtrack all the time either – so I must have heard it somewhere quite a bit.

    Mick could really get off on some bad paths at times in BAD tracks and got so dancey at one point – but his funky tracks are awesome.

  • http://www.bastardradio.com steed

    Haha. That's my life right there brother.

  • http://www.bullz-eye.com DavidMedsker

    True story about Climax Blues Band's “I Love You”: my brother and his wife wanted to dance to it at their wedding, but we couldn't find it anywhere (this was 1996). So my sister called a local radio station that was doing “love songs, nothing but love songs,” told the DJ her dilemma, and she said, “Turn on your radio at 9:45.”

    So we hooked a boom box into the DJ gear, and boom, there's my sister telling the story, the names of the bride and groom, everything. It was awesome. And now I love the song.

  • http://twostepcub.blogspot.com/ twostepcub

    Actually, That Total Age IS a hard listen, but a great aggression reliever (I still exercise to it). Their second album, Belief, is a lot more evolved, and even think it was on this site, if I'm correct. A lot more synths, and less pseudo-fascist shouting.

    Well your wallet should thank you for being so far. I probably could have bought a couple cars with the moola I've spent there.

  • thefxc

    Yeah, That Total Age is a brilliant Pure Industrial record, but I think Belief, Showtime, and the As Is EP are their most accomplished works–they channel that aggression into actual songs.

    Where is the youth? Where is the gold?

  • Scruffy9681

    I went through all your articles and this page here part 18 is the only one that works you cant listen to the other songs you think you can fix that?

  • http://www.popdose.com jefito

    Nothing to fix. The links only work for a week.

  • Scruffy9681

    do you have all these songs on you PC? if you do is there anyway i can get some of them off you? im putting to gether a collection missing a few songs you have 2 im missing
    Cindy Bullens– Trust Me & Breathless — Takin It Back

  • http://twostepcub.blogspot.com/ twostepcub

    Oh yeah, one more (late) thing. The Joyce Cobb track is kinda REALLY amateurish, but kinda cute, and not as horrific as the swill Allan Clarke's record is. Nothing smells worse than an aging talent dropping a turd in order to sound relevant. See how that went. Result.

  • http://twostepcub.blogspot.com/ twostepcub

    Oh yeah, one more (late) thing. The Joyce Cobb track is kinda REALLY amateurish, but kinda cute, and not as horrific as the swill Allan Clarke's record is. Nothing smells worse than an aging talent dropping a turd in order to sound relevant. See how that went. Result.

  • http://twostepcub.blogspot.com/ twostepcub

    Oh yeah, one more (late) thing. The Joyce Cobb track is kinda REALLY amateurish, but kinda cute, and not as horrific as the swill Allan Clarke's record is. Nothing smells worse than an aging talent dropping a turd in order to sound relevant. See how that went. Result.