This recent missive to Clive Davis, major label majordomo and Svengali to the Adult Contemporary set, discusses Uncle Donnie’s ideas for a post-comeback Whitney Houston comeback. Whether Clive or Whitney…
Unsolicited Career Advice
24 Articles
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised about this, but Lev brought over this missive in which Uncle Donnie weighs in on the ongoing Aerosmith drama. -RS TO: Steven Tyler FROM:…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
This is a memo written in 1977 to the Canadian management of Rush. If pictures from this period are any indication, Uncle Donnie had taken to sporting a green Mohawk…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
Just because you extol the virtues of super freaky girls…and you’re dead…doesn’t mean Uncle Donnie can’t give you a little advice, does it?
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
Yeah, sure, Courtney Love might seem like she has it all together — but Rob Smith’s Uncle Donnie Skwatzenschitz sees through that put-together facade, and he’s reaching out with a plan.
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
According to Lev, Uncle Donnie served in some capacity in the Def Leppard camp during the recording sessions for Adrenalize, and wound up going out with them on one of…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
Long, flowing hair, a perfectly groomed beard, and millions of records sold doesn’t mean you’re too good for a little advice, does it?
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
It’s time for more unsolicited career advice from Don Skwatzenschitz, and this week, he’s trying to help a furloughed Soldier of Love.
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
Does this man look like he needs career advice? Rob Smith’s Uncle Donnie Skwatzenschitz thought so.
Rob Smith
2 Min Read
Uncle Donnie apparently had a short-lived career in producing music videos, back in the early days of MTV. Lev let that one slip one night while we were doing shots…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
It’s interesting to note that, regardless of what he did in the music industry (and what he did is still lost on me) or how much power he was able…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
As I’ve mentioned previously, Uncle Donnie’s been writing these things for yearsÁ¢€”decades, even. Lev brings over another box of them every once in a while. This one dates back to…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
Many thanks to Reader Jeff (an old pal from my Rutgers days) for reminding me about the time Uncle Donnie was invited up on stage at a D’Angelo show to…
Rob Smith
2 Min Read
Lou Reed has a way of polarizing lovers of rock and roll, breaking up marriages, sending brothers off to war against one another, etc.Á‚ Uncle Donnie gets Lou, though, at…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
To know the unknowable is one of the great pursuits of sentient beings everywhere.Á‚ Has been for as long as there’s been sentient beings.Á‚ But to truly know the unknowable…
Rob Smith
3 Min Read
With this week’s installment of Unsolicited Advice, Rob Smith’s uncle Don Skwatzenschitz becomes the latest in a long line of people to try and figure out what’s wrong with R.E.M.’s career.
Rob Smith
2 Min Read
Wasn’t aware that Uncle Donnie had a hand in the movie business until I found this missive.Á‚ Of course, the “properties” he’s pushing probably explain why.Á‚ Still, wouldn’t it be…
Rob Smith
3 Min Read
Uncle Donnie gets pissed very rarely, but when he does he can certainly lay into you. I wonder what Scott Weiland thought when he got this. Á¢€”RS TO: Scott Weiland…
Rob Smith
3 Min Read
For someone who doesn’t know a lot about hip-hop (as we surmised from his memo to the late Tupac Shakur), Uncle Donnie does seem to be well acquainted with certain…
Rob Smith
3 Min Read
You wouldn’t know it by reading the following, but Uncle Donnie is afraid of British people.Á‚ Thought the Beatles were going to bring about a counter-Revolutionary War, in which England…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
Hip-hop music is not typically Uncle Donnie’s thing, nor is hip-hop slang, nor hip-hop fashion. Basically, Uncle Donnie doesn’t understand hip-hop, though he does try. Apparently, he doesn’t read much…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
Seems Uncle Donnie has recently taken a shine to the King of Pop; this particular missive was near the top of the Skwatzenschitz archive.Á‚ MJ could do worse than follow…
Rob Smith
1 Min Read
HereÁ¢€â„¢s another missive from the Skwatzenschitz archives, which I explained a bit last time. IÁ¢€â„¢m not sure how Jimmy Buffett reacted to Uncle DonnieÁ¢€â„¢s advice, but, to the best of…
Rob Smith
2 Min Read
You never know when your college friends may become useful professional contacts. One night 17 years ago, Lev Skwatzenschitz and I found ourselves stumbling down College Avenue at Rutgers, trading…
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