The Soul Is in the Bowl – Smokey Robinson

Chart Attack!, Episode 1

Chart Attack! The Podcast banner

Longtime Popdose devotees may be looking at this post and thinking, “Wait, Episode 1? Haven’t there been other Chart Attack! podcasts already? Is this some kind of shitty reboot?”

Allow me to clear up a few things.

The Popdose staff has been itching to do a Chart Attack! revival for some time, but wanted to be respectful of the fact that it was really Jason Hare’s baby and needed his input. So we decided to wait. Then we got tired of waiting and figured if Styx could carry on without Dennis DeYoung, we could carry on as well.

So while Matt Wardlaw distracted Hare by showing off his Foreigner 4 tattoo, the trio of Jeff Giles, Mike Heyliger, and Dave Lifton snuck off and recorded the first podcast featuring Chart Attack! in 14 months. But since this is in fact a separate endeavor from the flagship Popdose Podcast, we’re spinning it off.

Future episodes will feature a rotating set of contributors, which should hopefully keep things fresh for all involved and allow us to produce new installments on a more regular basis. Everybody all caught up now? Good! Let’s join Jeff, Mike, and Dave as they tackle the top ten songs from the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart for the week ended February 15, 1986.

10. “Conga” – Miami Sound Machine
9. “Sara” – Starship
8. “The Sweetest Taboo” – Sade
7. “Living in America” – James Brown
6. “I’m Your Man” – Wham!
5. “That’s What Friends Are For” – Dionne & Friends
4. “Kyrie” – Mr. Mister
3. “Burning Heart” – Survivor
2. “When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Going” – Billy Ocean
1. “How Will I Know” – Whitney Houston

Chart Attack, Episode 1 (1:12:23, 66.2 MB), featuring Jeff Giles, Mike Heyliger, and Dave Lifton. (Download from null )

Intro

0:00 A brief recap of what brought us to this moment.

0:55 Dick joke #1.

2:00 The first Chart Attack podcast in recent memory kicks off with… Gloria Estefan?

3:34 Gloria’s hair — Mom Mullet or Latin ‘fro?

11:40  Mike admits to liking “Sara,” while Jeff and Dave come to regret letting me pick the charts for these podcasts. Jeff remembers way too much about the video.

16:28 Fuck Matt Wardlaw #1.

16:49 Never mind Sade, let’s talk about Smokey Robinson’s microwaveable jambalaya.

21:58 Jeff hates “Living in America” but loves Rocky IV. Make of that what you will.

29:17 Remember when Motown was a thing? Those were good times.

32:45 The real reason this podcast will have a rotating cast of contributors? PTSD because of songs like “That’s What Friends Are For.”

38:41 Dave Lifton is Bob Dylan. Or his age at least.

39:00 If Pat Mastelotto is listening to this, please send a note to jefito with the subject line “I’m listening, wanker.”

45:32 Another goddamn Matt Wardlaw shout-out. Ugh.

47:56 Fuck Matt Wardlaw #2. That’s better.

49:54 It’s Billy Ocean, the R&B Reverse Samson!

59:18 One year after Whitney Houston’s death, the guys remember her and a very good pop song.

Wrapup

We hope you enjoyed the debut edition of Chart Attack! If you didn’t, well, that’s 72 minutes of your life you’re not getting back. Come back for the second episode next month won’t you? And while you’re at it, please leave us a review on iTunes, and don’t forget to visit our Facebook fan page as well as the Popdose Twitter feed. Thanks for listening and we’ll see you next month!

And fuck Matt Wardlaw (#3).




  • mfeldman

    Ooh, I hope someday you do the chart that you used for the background to your banner above. I can say with 100% certainty that it dates from right around Labor Day 1983, the very week I first became hyper-aware of the pop charts, and I can almost guarantee you I know what the #1 song would’ve been that’s just cut off at the top (a certain signature song with a lot of repetition by a certain synth-pop duo involving skinny ties and very short red hair, right?). And #4, which you can only see the first letter of, was a certain out-of-left-field dance cover of something from the pre-rock-and-roll era, right? Some of the greatest singles of the ’80s were all on there simultaneously – it was a glorious summer for music.
    February 1986, though, some pretty hard-core camp there… I’d say come back to 1986 in about two months and you’ll see some huge improvements.

  • http://www.wingsforwheels.net dslifton

    Sadly, I think that Chris Holmes has a rule in place prohibiting me from talking about any chart that contains a Billy Joel song.

  • Aron

    Tough chart to start with. Billy Ocean (!) is the only one with a decent song here and there are 2 of the worst songs of the decade (Sara and Dionne and Friends).This was just in the middle of a Hot 100 graveyard during the 80s.

  • http://www.popdose.com jefito

    Tough going for sure. But when the going gets tough…

  • http://www.grayflannelsuit.net/ Chris Holmes

    Well I’ll tell you what, Dave. The chart for March’s podcast is set as you know, but if you can find a Billy song that was in the top ten in April for a given year, I’ll see what I can do for you.

  • http://www.popdose.com jefito

    I will only allow this if Ted Asregadoo is a co-host.

  • http://www.wingsforwheels.net dslifton

    Seconded.

  • http://www.popdose.com/ DwDunphy

    Terrific. Now I have to call Chaka Khan.

  • http://www.popdose.com/ Michael Parr

    Thirded? Either way, make it happen!

  • http://www.popdose.com/ Michael Parr

    A few thoughts:

    “Sarah” is the only Starship song I don’t mind, though I could care less if I never heard it again.

    “Kyrie” was awesome because he was talking about frickin’ lasers! LASERS!

    I can’t wait to be quick enough to raise my hand for one of these.

  • http://www.popdose.com/ Ted

    I’m in!

  • http://www.wingsforwheels.net dslifton

    Jeff’s mom told me that you’re too quick.

  • http://www.popdose.com/ Michael Parr

    That was as lazy as Jeff’s mom told me you are.

  • http://twitter.com/Gonzeux zs

    I’ve always loved the Chart Attack podcasts – glad it’s now a regular ‘cast of its own.

    Listened to this while on a long run today, laughed aloud many times (much to the befuddlement of passersby).

  • http://www.wingsforwheels.net dslifton

    She says she wants to do all the work. It hurts her when I take charge. I can’t help it if it’s not the same for you.

  • http://www.popdose.com jefito

    Glad to hear it!

  • http://www.popdose.com/ Ted

    I really loved this podcast. Very funny and informative stuff for a group of songs that I really want to forget — except for “The Sweetest Taboo.”

  • http://www.popdose.com jefito

    Thanks, Ted. I look forward to hearing you grimace your way through a Billy Joel hit during your upcoming episode.

  • http://www.popdose.com/ Ted

    Taking one for the team, I suppose (Re: Billy Joel).

  • mfeldman

    I agree, “The Sweetest Taboo” is the best song here by leaps and bounds. And I’m pretty sure I’d call “How Will I Know” the second best, which illustrates what a scary set of songs this truly is. Hilarious podcast, keep up the good work!

  • mstgator

    It must be noted, of course, that “When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going” has NINE words in its title, so of course it stalled at #2. “Caribbean Queen (No More Love On The Run)”, “There’ll Be Sad Songs (To Make You Cry)”, and “Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car” were his three number ones (all with eight words in the title).