Seriously, in staff voting, not only did we have a video catch six votes, we had four of them! Any tie breakers? Not at all. That means that the top song for the year was either beaten four times, or we failed. We failed. It’s so depressing.
Any dang way, time to roll out 1993. Can you feel the love tonight?
Six Votes Out On The Ocean
Dr. Dre – Nuthin’ But A “G” Thang: And by “G,” he means “grrrrreat!”
The Proclaimers – I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles): I tried to wolk fave hoandrid mails, and it nearly killed me. Those mails are friggin’ murder.
Gin Blossoms – Hey Jealousy: If I hadn’t blown the whole thing years ago, maybe I wouldn’t have to take so much aspirin now.
Tears For Fears – Break It Down Again: The Revolution may be someone somewhere else, like the New Power Generation, later on the list… but YouTube doesn’t have an official video available. Check out a live clip here…
Four Votes Gruff
Duran Duran – Ordinary World: The superheroes from Ordinary World tend to be certified public accountants.
Prince and the New Power Generation – 7: Don’t look inside the box, Prince! That’s Gwynneth’s head! (This video has been altered for your Purpleness’ protection)
Naughty By Nature – Hip Hop Hooray: They played this for Ervine’s retirement party and he wound up having a heart attack. The doctors claimed it was the high blood pressure and the stress, but we knew. We knew.
Digable Planets – Rebirth Of Slick (Cool Like Dat): ‘Cause I’m sanguine like that, morose like that, distant like that…
Ice Cube – It Was A Good Day: So when do we get the Ice Cube remake of Crocodile Dundee?
Cypress Hill – Insane In The Brain: If you’re going to bring up membranes, make sure you’ve brought enough medulla oblongata for everyone.
Janet Jackson – If: When? What? Why? HOW?!
Three Votes of Paint
Janet Jackson – That’s The Way Love Goes: Yup, it goes to Starbucks for a mocha frappucino. And you should go too! (We’re waiting for our free frappucinos now!)
Madonna – Deeper And Deeper: We could go classy and not make a sex joke here, but by saying we won’t, I guess we already have. Oh Madonna, it’s a wonder you don’t have arthritis in the pelvis by now.
Expose – I’ll Never Get Over You Getting Over Me: I’ll never get over last night’s very special episode of The Biggest Loser, so we’re even.
And the number one song of the year gets out of dodge in Kevin Costner’s arms, meaning everyone lost.
Whitney Houston – I Will Always Love You: You-eeee-ooooo-oooo-ohhhhhh!!! Eeeeeee-oooohhhhhh!!! Eeee-oohhhh!