Everyone has that song that they like beyond all logical explanation. This is mine.

The rational part of my brain knows that this a ‘pieces parts’ kind of song. The rhythm track and bass line are a near note-for-note ripoff of Janet Jackson’s “What Have You Done for Me Lately,” which stormed the charts nine months earlier. Chico’s vocals are wafer-thin, and while it’s tempting say that this would explain why he was never allowed to be in the band that bears his name, that would be giving his older siblings far too much credit. Lastly, sweet Jesus, look at that cover. Hideous ’80s hair, and an equally hideous, midriff-baring outfit to go with it. What they didn’t steal to make this song, they took from a dumpster and assembled with duct tape and discarded wallpaper.

And I like it anyway.

Listen to the thump of that drum track. Big, exploding snare drum, then POW! The biggest handclap ever put to tape, not to mention lots and lots of cowbell, which recent studies have shown cures cancer, re-grows hair and will help you get back together with your ex-girlfriend. They even engage in a little studio wizardry with some backwards bits to lure in remix geeks like me, while that brand-new sampler begs for its life. “T-t-t-t-talk to me, baby.” All right, now drop an octave. “Taaaaaaalk tooo meeee baaaaaaaaaaby.” Very much of the moment, but pretty damn funky for a mid-’80s Motown record. Still, the song is such a ripoff of Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis’ production on Janet’s Control (1986) that it’s equal parts ‘answer’ record and hate-fueled skull-fucking. “I’m Berry Gordy, bitch!” (more…)