Many thanks to Reader Jeff (an old pal from my Rutgers days) for reminding me about the time Uncle Donnie was invited up on stage at a D’Angelo show to play tambourine. Well, he wasn’t really invited; he just kinda wandered up there. But according to Jeff, Donnie had some mad percussion skills, so much so that D’Angelo didn’t notice him until the encore. Jeff also mentioned the air in the arena was thick with the scent of the stuff we used to smell coming out of “Boner” Bonaski’s room on the weekends. Anyway, Uncle Donnie recently had some words for D’Angelo, and I faithfully reprint them here. – RS

TO: D’Angelo
FROM: Don Skwatzenschitz
RE: Career advice

Nine years? Could it really be nine years since you dropped Voodoo on us, made everyone who heard you a fan, wowed everyone who saw you live with one of the great soul tours of the last two or three decades, excited all the women who thought they were seeing you naked in that video (including Mitzi, my wife—you remember her, don’t you? Five-three, pink and blue floral housecoat, loves cooking with G-13)? Nine years? Halley’s Comet might not come around as often as you release records, but at least we know when we’ll see it again.

That Spin magazine article from last year got us all worried about your apparent drinking problem, but it also gave us hope. Half an album nearly done, maybe even a little more, and progress being made toward completing it? It reminded us you were out there, somewhere, working through your problems, yes, but also creating again. It whetted the appetite, but that’s all. And hell, Maxwell is even back with a new single, a tour, and (allegedly) an album on the way. He also looks like he’s taken to wearing a Mario Van Peebles mask around all day, every day.

Nine years? Time to get back in the game, buddy. But if you don’t want to, I understand. I have some alternatives for you, though. What do you think about the following? (more…)