If you were a child of the ’80s, you or somebody you knew probably owned a Cabbage Patch Kids doll. They were so popular that stores were inundated with customers wanting them at Christmas. (For those of you too young to remember, imagine the frenzy of the Tickle Me Elmo and the Nintendo Wii Christmases put together.) The album Cabbage Patch Dreams attempts to put together a storyline for these characters.
In the first song, a stork introduces the concept of the Cabbage Patch Kids, which somehow involve magic cabbages and bunny bee crystals. Don’t ask me to explain that. I don’t get it either.
You can’t have an adventure without a villain, and in this case we get three of them: Lavender McDade (your typical scary little old lady), Beau Weasel (a weasel), and Cabbage Jack, a rabbit who’s upset that his favorite food is being turned into babies and flirts precariously close to sounding like an African-American stereotype.
