Posts Tagged ‘Police’

Bottom Feeders: The Ass End of the ’80s, Part 69 (Heh, Heh)

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This is one of the very few places where I can make a statement like “I was so excited to find a near-mint copy of the Electric Dreams soundtrack” and get reactions other than people calling me a dork under their breath.

There’s this very cool shop in Reading, Pennsylvania, called Vertigo Music that’s run by this cool indie girl (one day I’ll ask her her name so that I can stop saying, “You know … that store with the cool indie girl”). I stop by on many of my trips to that area. She’s got a nice pile of one-dollar records, and the better albums are very reasonably priced. A few weeks ago I located the soundtrack I mentioned above for $8, which to me is a steal for something I don’t think I’d ever seen before. I also was able to pick up the Nails’ Mood Swings (featuring their only hit, “88 Lines About 44 Women”), another album I’d been searching for a long time.

I mention this for two reasons. The first is because I know you’ll understand my excitement in finding two albums I’ve wanted in my collection forever. No one else really does, to be honest. Second, I feel the need to let the world know about this place. In my area, just finding a record store is difficult, but when you walk into one that’s clean, inviting, well organized, and has a great selection of music without being overwhelming … well, it begs some attention. I’m assuming she does more business through her Gemm site than in-store, but if you’re ever in Reading, you should definitely stop in and check it out. The world needs more of these types of record stores.

Anyway, how about some more songs from artists whose names begin with the letter P, as we take a look at the bottom feeders — songs that charted at #41 or lower — from the Billboard Hot 100 chart during the 1980s.

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Song-Off Jr.: Nontraditional Law Enforcement

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… And there was another one, posted right on the front of the checkout desk, that struck a chill as deep as January down Sam’s back. It showed a dismayed boy and girl, surely no older than eight, cringing back from a man in a trenchcoat and a gray hat. The man looked at least eleven feet tall; his shadow fell on the upturned faces of the children. The brim of his 1940s-style fedora threw its own shadow, and the eyes of the man in the trenchcoat gleamed relentlessly from its black depths. They looked like chips of ice as they studied the children, marking them with the grim gaze of Authority. He was holding out an ID folder with a star pinned to it — an odd sort of star, with at least nine points on it. Maybe as many as a dozen. The message beneath read:

AVOID THE LIBRARY POLICE!

–Stephen King, “The Library Policeman” (from 1990’s Four Past Midnight)

Cheap Trick – “Dream Police”

Radiohead – “Karma Police”

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As a law-abiding citizen, which man are you less likely to be hassled by?

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Last week Steely Dan lived up to their name, scoring a plurality of 47% of the action. The Kinks came in a close second with 41%, while the Beach Boys sat in the corner and watched with just 15% of the votes. Join us again next week as we celebrate Easter and address the thorny subject of Resurrections.

Dw. Dunphy On… Elvis Costello and the Police, August 3, PNC Arts Center

The Police make me thankful The Beatles never had a full-fledged reunion.

It was a strange Sunday evening in the wilds of Holmdel, New Jersey. The PNC Arts Center usually allows patrons onto the property two hours before show time at 6:00 PM, and so I found myself on the Garden State Parkway with Elvis Costello’s Brutal Youth CD on the stereo and thoughts of scoring a sensible parking space bouncing in my brain. Little did I know that, as a courtesy to the weekenders, the venue let people in at 4:00. They dumped me out into the adjacent woods to park! This did not bode well.

I’ll freely admit I was more excited to see Costello and the Impostors and was not disappointed. Mixing older fan favorites like “Pump It Up,” “Every Day I Write The Book,” and the requisite “(What’s So Funny ‘Bout) Peace, Love And Understanding” with newer songs like “45″ from When I Was Cruel and “American Gangster Time” from the current and very worthwhile Momofuku album, Costello covered the necessary bases. Performing them with the gusto and spastic fire of a man half his age was wonderful to see, especially after hearing all the rumors that things would be toned down for those tender Jerseyan sensibilities. And just to give the set an extra dash of coolness, Sting came out to duet on “Allison.”

Now, had the evening ended there, I wouldn’t have walked away from this performance completely baffled. It would have been my shortest concert experience, but we all would have felt like we wanted to be in the same room with each other, band included. We’re all aware of the behind-the-scenes tensions purportedly happening in Camp Police. We’re also aware that even back in the early days, Sting commanded the majority of the attention, a position that could quickly irritate, and while hearsay shouldn’t color one’s impressions so early in the game, it was evident when Sting, Andy Summers and Stewart Copeland took the stage that they were plainly irritated.

The PNC Arts Center is a weird venue to start with. It is essentially a large, round coffee table where you and the stage are placed beneath. It is both an indoor and outdoor theater and, at the same time, neither. So there is a tendency to rig the electronics and the mix to accommodate all seats, including the uncovered lawn seats to the far back. The upshot is that the mix tends to be louder than it truly needs, causing all the music to come at you as a bass-heavy muddle. It can be compensated for. A few years back, Megadeth played the main Gigantour stage and the sonics were perfectly fine. An hour earlier, Dream Theater was on and the sound was that of a seal being clubbed (miked from the inside of the seal, no less). The Police, by contrast, were much louder than either of those bands, louder than any other show I’ve seen there this year, and easily the most sonically murky. (more…)