For a genre that makes its living by cutting up other people’s records, hip-hop artists are notoriously touchy about other people touching theirs. Eric B. and Rakim reportedly hated Coldcut’s remix of their song “Paid in Full,” despite the fact that the Coldcut mix became a crossover smash and scored the rap duo major airplay in the otherwise lily-white modern rock clubs. Your typical rap 12” single in the late ‘80s consisted of the LP version, an instrumental version, and a B-side. That’s it. Rappers were perfectly happy to remix someone else’s song – or add a rhyme or two for a small fee, like Eric B. & Rakim did to Jody Watley’s “Friends” – but granting access to their master tracks? You must be trippin’.

Luckily for us, in more ways than one, De La Soul is not your typical hip-hop band. They embraced the 12” single, issuing a ton of remixes, alternate versions and B-sides. It stands to reason that signing to the remix-happy Tommy Boy Records – whose vaults will be raided at least two more times in the near future – played a major role in this decision, though one suspects that the band would have gone this route regardless. Further nailing the remix point home, De La didn’t give up their anti-drug rant “Say No Go” (download) to just anyone; the song was remixed by C.J. MacIntosh and Dave Dorrell, the duo who got a hold of a certain dovetailing white-label single called “Pump Up the Volume,” added some samples and scratching, and turned it into a worldwide smash. Learn those names: you’ll see them frequently enough that you’ll suspect that they’re paying me to talk about them. They’re not, of course, but if they’re looking for a little extra ink, I take PayPal.

MacIntosh and Dorrell’s mix of “Say No Go” is indicative of their style at the time; the horns are nice and echo-y, and you can practically see them chomping at the bit to scratch the shit out of the Daryl Hall vocal snippet that gives the song its title. (Seriously, what was Simply Red thinking when they tried to write a song around the same sample 15 years later?) They also have some fun with the faux-scream snippet from the disco classic “Best of My Love,” even spinning it backwards Art of Noise-style. The rest of the mix is remarkably respectful of the original. It has a slow build-up in the intro, a slow breakdown in the outro, and treats everything in between with an eye for the dance floor and an ear for the fan.

That whole pay-respect-to-the-original-song thing would begin its slow death the following year, and one of the first mixes to take out a brick in the wall would be by…C.J. MacIntosh and Dave Dorrell. Thank goodness they didn’t start that trend here.

Popularity: 11% [?]

In the mid ‘80s, Dead Milkmen were a college radio programmer’s wet dream. They were smart, snotty, and loud at a time when most bands were polished and pre-recorded. They made fun of anyone and everyone. They even took a shot at Stevie Ray Vaughn once, calling him a “cheesy Texas motherfucker.” (As tempting as it is to pass judgment on the band for making such a claim, it appears that time has already done that on our behalf.)

It was therefore only a matter of time before Dead Milkmen set their sights on the dance-oriented bands that were stealing their college radio glory. And what better way to defeat your enemy than by singing his song: “Instant Club Hit (You’ll Dance to Anything)” (download), from the band’s 1987 album Bucky Fellini, is completely programmed — save for one well-timed outburst on guitar — and in fact it appears they deliberately used machines that were already outdated, in order to prove their point about the music’s disposability. Depeche Mode, Siouxsie & the Banshees, the Smiths, Public Image Ltd. and Book of Love — all of whom, curiously, will be the subject of future White Label Friday features — suffer the Milkmen’s wrath, along with the “danceteria types” who worshiped them. You want to put an indelible time stamp on your music? Use a word like ‘danceteria.’

The club DJs, of course, loved “Instant Club Hit.” Even the ones with 80 pounds of makeup on their art school skin thought it was funny. I mean, how do you not love a song that tells the people dancing to it that they’re all a bunch of art fags?

Popularity: 9% [?]

It has been said that Kurt Cobain later complained about the slick sheen that mixer Andy Wallace gave to Nevermind. While it is unknown whether Essex industrialists Nitzer Ebb feel the same way about the production on “Join in the Chant” (download), it would come as no surprise to learn that they held a similar displeasure — viewed it as a compromise of their integrity, etc. But here’s the thing: Nevermind doesn’t sell a tenth as many copies without that mix job (ironically, that probably would have suited Cobain just fine). Likewise, Nitzer Ebb never makes a blip on the radar without Phil Harding, the mixer of choice for the pop production trio Stock, Aitken and Waterman, at the boards for “Join in the Chant.” Even the most accessible of the modern rock bands were having trouble making the jump to the mainstream; that an industrial track went Top 10 on the Dance charts in 1987, and the slot Nitzer Ebb subsequently scored as the opening act for Depeche Mode on the Music for the Masses tour, are unthinkable without Harding’s involvement.

There is little else to say about this song that the song does not say itself. The bass line has five notes, and does not deviate from them, ever. The percussion track consists almost entirely of the sound of metal on metal. There there’s the vocal, which is the stuff of legend: Guns, guns, guns, guns. Fire! Fire! Fire! Singer Douglas McCarthy wasn’t asking, he was ordering. Start dancing, you fuckers.

Popularity: 13% [?]

Greetings, Popdosers. Lord Jefito has bestowed me with the honor of running the weekly shake-ya-ass column, and I, for lack of a better word, am positively geeked out by it. I worked as a club DJ in the late ‘80s, so I know the period Jeff’s previous posts highlighted (Art of Noise, Bomb the Bass, Coldcut remixing Eric B. & Rakim) like it was yesterday. In fact, it’s sometimes easier to think that it was yesterday, rather than accept that those days are 20 years behind me. Sigh.

The decades-long career of Canadian dark wavers Moev is not terribly noteworthy; the band released an album, the label buried them, they signed to a major label, the major label buried them. Band members came and went like they were a Gothic Deep Purple. However, the one truly noteworthy contribution Moev made to the world of music was a big one: frustrated with the poor label support the band had received, guitarist Mark Jowett teamed up with band manager Terry McBride to start their own label in order to guarantee that their records would get a satisfactory level of attention. That was none other than Nettwerk Records, home to Sarah McLachlan, BT, Sixpence None the Richer and the entire Canadian electronic scene. We’ll be covering another one of those alt-Can Nettwerk bands next week, in fact. No, it’s not Skinny Puppy.

If you didn’t know any better, you’d think “Crucify Me” (download) was the result of a bunch of studio executives looking to create a Frankenband, combining the ingredients of other successful bands on the burgeoning modern rock scene into one beastly package. The song’s bass line is filled with the kind of pops and octave jumps that John Taylor patented on the early Duran Duran records, and the vocals – which consist of one line sung over and over — are pure Sisters of Mercy. The rest of the track is akin to Ministry’s Twitch (think “Over the Shoulder”). A little industrial, a little Goth, a little funk: Moev wasn’t taking any chances on missing out on a target audience, any target audience. Give them credit, then, for showing a sense of humor about it by including a vocal sample that says “For the masses,” since they had to know that their music was anything but.

Okay, so the song is trying way too hard, but consider it in context: when “Crucify Me” was released, Ministry had not yet gone all mad-as-hell, the Sisters of Mercy were not yet a bloated bore, and Duran Duran had notched a Top 5 single within the last year (”I Don’t Want Your Love”) . Combining those elements was not at all a bad idea, and damned if Moev didn’t create something both dark and fun, if not exactly deep.

Popularity: 10% [?]