Tuesday, December 1st, 2009

The First Day of Mellowmas: The Gates of Mell

by Jason Hare

Ding dong! Hi, it’s Jeff Giles and Jason Hare, and we’re here to…wait! Wait! No! Don’t slam the door! It’s cold out here! Don’t worry, we’re not looking for money or food or anything (although we will eat your food if you offer it to us). We just want to spread some joy to your life this holiday season! Is that so wrong?

No?

Good. Could we come in, then, please? Thank you.

Ha HA! Gotcha, suckas! Yes, it’s that time of year again. It’s time for the two of us to terrorize you on a daily basis with the musical equivalent of fruitcake! It’s time for…

Whether you’re a longtime reader of Popdose or you’re a new visitor to our site, all stand something to lose from this glorious holiday. A brief history: in 2006, after many Adventures Through the Mines of Mellow Gold, the two of us set out to find as many mellow holiday songs — recorded by mellow artists — as possible, figuring they might be kind of awful. We were both thrilled and dismayed to find out we were right — and thus, Mellowmas was born. In subsequent years, Mellowmas has shifted to represent all that is cruddy with holiday music. Actually, there’s someone out there who can describe it better than we can. Ladies and gentlemen, once again, we present you with Mellow Gold’s very own “Undercover Angel,” Alan O’Day!

Alan O’Day — Have a Very Mellowmas (Theme From Mellowmas) (download)

Yes, we know many of you have heard this song before — it was our featured theme last year. But it’s not every day that you get an actual Mellow Gold artist to take your phone call, let alone write and record a theme song for your stupid made-up holiday. So take a listen — even if you think you remember it from last year, listen again, it’s worth it — and sit back in terrorized anticipation. From tomorrow until December 25th, visit Popdose every morning to enjoy some yellow snow in the form of a musical track. The two of us will offer up commentary on each song, and invite you to join us for further discussion in the comments! It’s the gift that keeps on giving, until you’re ready to throw up!

If you’d like to brush up on your Mellowmas history, part of 2006’s holiday (6 of the 12 tracks) and 2007’s holiday (all 25!) are available at Jason’s site — and all of 2008 is available here. Enjoy (as best you can, anyway) and we’ll see you here tomorrow for more Mellowmas!

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 1st, 2009 at 7:30 am and is filed under Featured, Featured - Frontpage, Mellowmas, Music. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

  • oh no. it's time? already? i feel like someone who sold his soul to the devil for some wonderful blogging, but now the devil has come to take what he is owed. (if i'm not being clear, Mellowmas is the devil in that example)
  • Oh god no.
  • It's alive. It's alive! IT'S ALIVE, IT'S ALIVE, IT'S ALI--- (ahem)

    Yippee.
  • I get to live through the hell of Xmas songs at work (Which, by the way, are the SAME songs we've been playing on the air for the 11 years I've been working there), but there's something cathartic and cleansing about Mellowmas. It reminds me that the song selections at work could be far worse!
  • Have you worked your "Wonderful Christmastime" remix into the playlist yet?
  • I would, but I need my job right now.
  • Another reason why George is my favorite Beatle: as far as I know, he didn't record any Christmas solo material (yes, "War is Over" is a pretty good song, but that Yoko-led chorus! Oh God!).
  • JonCummings
    Wrong!!!! George did indeed record "Ding Dong, Ding Dong," which is about as bad as it gets. It's on the "Dark Horse" album. I guess, if you want to be picky, it's more of a New Year's song than a Christmas song (lots of "ring out the old, ring in the new" cliches)--which may explain why it sunk without a trace and never gets holiday-radio airplay. That, and the fact that it's vacuous garbage.

    Ringo, to the best of my knowledge, has never done a solo Christmas single. And all the Beatles get a bit of a pass for their Christmas carnage, as far as I'm concerned, because their fan-club Xmas records as a band were thoroughly aces.
  • MarkoP
    Apparently Ringo did release "Come On Christmas, Christmas Come On" from his 1999 album "I wanna be Santa Claus" as a single.

    Unless you mean that Ringo never released a Christmas single that was not part of any album.
  • JonCummings
    Jeez, I even have that album and I forgot all about it! Poor Ringo...no respect. No respect at all.

    As long as we're on the subject, a fun fact: "Happy Xmas (War is Over)" made it to #4 on Britain's all-important Christmas-week singles chart in '72 (then went back to #4 in '80), while "Wonderful Christmastime" made it to #6 in '79. "Ding Dong, Ding Dong" only made it to #38 in '74. "Come On Christmas," if it was indeed released as a single, seems to have made no impact whatsoever. No respect.
  • Jon:

    You'll have to blame Lord Tennyson as much as George for "Ding Dong":
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ring_Out,_Wild_Bells
  • Sounds like that "Colon Cleanse" infomercial featuring that creepy poop doctor with the lounge lizard mustache... Only dressed in red and dropping 'em down chimneys.
  • Can't wait to load up my iPod with every Mellowmas track and sabotage a perfectly good Christmas party.
  • I wholeheartedly endorse this idea. I think tomorrow's song will work wonderfully.
  • I have every intention of using the 25 days of Mellowmas playlist to assault my family this year. It will inevitably backfire on me. My mother is a "Fanilow" after all...
  • jamesballenger
    If you can work in some of Dylan's new Christmas stuff too, that would be the kittens pajamas. Ah Mellowmas how I missed you.
  • kingofgrief
    At last, after having my curiosity piqued by references on Bottom Feeders and elsewhere, I get to bask in the (arguable) glory of Mellowmas. And with an opening theme by the author of "Angie Baby", no less. Hark the Undercover Angels sing!*

    *Alternate gratuitous cross-reference: Undercover Angels we have heard on high...
  • The glory of Mellowmas. The juxtaposition nearly gave me a stroke.
  • alanoday
    Hey Jeff & Jason,
    'Tis the Season! Fun to check out your site, & see the video again. It seems my song has stood the test of time, it's just as bad as last year! Wishing you 23 more days of mellow mediocrity.
    Alan
  • It's a holiday classic, Alan! And just wait until you hear what we have in store this year!
  • walloffsound
    it's gonna be an evergreen festive song lol ... i only hope it will not be a mellowmas unto itself in years to come ROFL
    anyway, just wanted to say my son loved it the first time he heard it last year (he was 3 then) ... and he actually asked for it to be played again this year well before this "2nd coming" post of yours hahaha
    he's favorite parts (now as was then) :
    "daddy, what's mellowmas" ... "daddy, where did mellowmas come from" ... "daddy, what's that glistening in the snow? .... and especially the poop bit LOL

    just one thing though, i didnt really explain what your song is actually about to the lad *evil grin*
  • Best comment ever. Thanks!
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