We’re on Day Nine of the Mellowmas Craptacular – are you still with us? Jeff picked quite a few of the tracks for Mellowmas, but I’m proud to say I foisted yesterday’s Fogelberg upon him…and this one, too! (You’re welcome.)

Mirror Image – The Twelve Days Of Christmas (download or stream below)
From Yuletide Disco


[audio: Image – The Twelve Days Of Christmas.mp3]

Jeff: Oh Jesus.

Jason: YES!!!!

Jeff: What is this? Is this Meco?

Jason: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Disco Mellowmas, Bitch!

Jeff: Wow.

Jason: Doo doo do doo! And it goes on like this FOR ANOTHER THREE MINUTES.

Jeff: I’m stunned.

Jason: does happy dance Doo doo do doo! There’s the piano!

Jeff: Where did you find this? And can you put it back?

Jason: I can’t quite remember. I found it recently. I was looking for a supposed classic disco Christmas album. This is not that album.

Jeff: I feel like I’m watching the beginning of a CBS holiday special from 1979.

Jason: Oh, hang on, breaking it down. Break it down, Jeff!

Jeff: Breaking it down all right.

Jason: Are you boogie-ing? Feel the boogie!

Jeff: That isn’t boogie I feel. God, this song is like twelve minutes long…

Jason: So anyway, yeah, I couldn’t find the actual disco album in question, and somehow came across this one. And the worst part is that it’s not REALLY disco. It’s like imitation disco. It’s like store-brand disco. I think if it were true disco, it probably would be tolerable in a so-bad-it’s-good kind of way.

Jeff: Those horns are making me die. And that piano can go to hell.

Jason: resumes happy dance

Jeff: Flutes!


Jeff: Three bitchin’ Ludes! Two lines of coke!

Jason: One wah-wah pedal!

Jeff: And a white linen suit in a pear tree!

Jason: Clap! Clap! Clap! Are you dancing in your seat? Because I’m dancing in my seat!

Jeff: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

Jason: Oh, finally, we get some true disco bass. Doo doo do doo! Hahahah! Fade out! What a fucking cop-out!

Jeff: An abrupt fadeout, too! I tell you what, though. This is better than the Fogelberg.

Jason: You think? If only we could somehow combine the two.

Jason: Acoustic Irish holiday disco. You know what the abrupt fadeout means?

Jeff: I wonder if someone had a heart attack, so they had to fade it out sooner than they’d planned.

Jason: Exactly! Either that or they just passed out.

Jeff: Dear God. A Bolivian Christmas.

Jason: God can’t help you here.

Jeff: You can eat shit for sending this to me.

Jason: I’ve never been happier than I am right now.