The funny thing about music in 1985: they would make an extended mix of anything. Even funnier, people would dance to it.
Take this weekÁ¢€™s subject, the UK band Vitamin Z Á¢€” pronounced Veetamin Zed by their fellow countrymen Á¢€” who made their biggest splash with a slick, overproduced slice of mid-tempo ear candy called Á¢€Å“Burning Flame.Á¢€ Singer Geoff Barradale (now the manager of the Arctic Monkeys, thank you very much) does a mean Curt Smith impression Á¢€” which might explain why the band opened for Tears for Fears at one point Á¢€” and the song boasts a catchy, if wimpy, chorus. Á¢€Å“How you teased when I first made loveÁ¢€? Even Morrissey blushed at that line. The song had its charms, but a catchy beat that makes you want to shake your groove thing isnÁ¢€™t one of them.
And yet, this song was a big hit on the dance charts. The Dead Milkmen werenÁ¢€™t kidding: we really will dance to anything.
This is not to denigrate the extended version any; given what they had to work with, the mix works rather well with the breakdowns and echoed vocals and what have you. Still, itÁ¢€™s not a dance track. Was there anyone circling the dance floor in 1985, saying to themselves, Á¢€Å“This music is fine, but IÁ¢€™m not going out there until I hear Á¢€ËœBurning FlameÁ¢€™Á¢€? There must have been, if the songÁ¢€™s chart success is to be believed, but who were those people? For some reason, I keep picturing stock brokers with ponytails. Whatever the case, they were white, thatÁ¢€™s for sure.
In fact, letÁ¢€™s have some fun with this. I officially declare Á¢€Å“Burning FlameÁ¢€ to be one of the whitest songs ever recorded. LetÁ¢€™s hear your suggestions for other songs that share this dubious distinction. Bonus points if there is an extended dance mix of the song as well.
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