I have created the perfect rock star…one part power pop, one part classic rock and one part alterna-angst. We shall call her:

Alanis Van Morrissey

First single? “You Oughta Know Your Brown-Eyed Girlfriend’s In a Coma”

Note: This joke only sorta works when you pronounce “Van” as van, not “von”.

Morrissey slags another world leader. Nothing new but this actually made the front page of the Drudge Report today, causing Republicans nationwide to stare at their monitors and mutter “Morrissey, who?!?”

Yes, this is me putting off Part Two of the Hollywood Starlet’s Pool Party. Later this week, promise.