Song for the Soundtrack of Your Date (No Date) Tonight: Valentine’s Day Edition

Valentine’s Day, now cleverly known as “Singles Awareness Day,” is a moody melodrama waiting to unfold. The pressure to express all your love in one 24 hour period is overwhelming and expensive. Fugly red roses choked by floral industry parasite, baby’s breath, are more expensive to acquire than Justin Timberlake’s MySpace purchase. And at the end of the day, it really comes down to the words of Our Lady of Over Yoga’d Arms: “Music makes the people come together.” So tonight, dear friends, push aside the Hallmark, put on the music, and come together. I’ve got a couple of friends that’ll show you how.

Our special guests this evening were early appreciators of a good love song and a good break-up song. We’ve got two selections from the point of view of the Married Guy, Mr. Ian Lozada, and taking on the viewpoint of the Single Ladies is a double scoop of songs from Ms. Melinda Meservy. Ms. M happens to have scored a date this evening, but she’s a Singles sympathizer and a music enthusiast. A warm welcome and a sloppy kiss to Song for the Soundtrack of Your Date (No Date) Tonight, the VD edition.

Ian Lozada, Married Guy

Song for the Soundtrack of Your Date Tonight

Truth is, you’ve never been good at keeping your stories straight. You can attract em, all right, but making things last isn’t your strong suit. Which is why you can’t remember if the redhead across the table from you is named Cheryl, Carol or if you just haven’t recovered from last night’s marathon viewing of Archer episodes. Doesn’t matter when you’re checking your phone under the table for texts from your ex-wife’s number. Not that she’s after you– it’s just that your oldest daughter has figured out how to send you the occasional ”I love you, Daddy” text.

Song for the Soundtrack of Your No Date Tonight

Perhaps it wasn’t such a good idea to wait till 3PM on February 14th to start making calls about restaurant reservations. No matter, the kids are packed off to Grandma’s, the candles are lit, and you’ve got a killer recipe for chicken cutlets in a nice white wine reduction and a ripping lentil soup that she has no idea you can pull off. And hell, you even vacuumed.

Melinda Meservy, Unmarried and Mingling

Song for the Soundtrack of Your Date Tonight

Let’s be honest. Valentine’s is a bullshit holiday. Somewhere along the line it changed from that day you dropped little cards and candy hearts into shoeboxes decorated with crepe paper to, well…an evening so full of expectation it rivals only Christmas in impossible fulfillment. And that’s when you have a date. But hey, you do have one. Someone whose heart beats real live human blood and whose body is there to cuddle up to. Bless that man. Bless him twice if he loves you, and three times if you love him back. Pay attention girl, it is —after all — the greatest thing you’ll ever learn.

https://youtu.be/hoR_VZAlxHg

Song for the Soundtrack of Your No Date Tonight

Let’s be honest. Valentine’s is…that’s right, just another day cooked up by ambitious upstarts in the advert business looking to climb the corporate ladder. Never mind that there are roses, chocolates, and couples on the big V date around every corner. You can smell the frustrated expectations around them like a knock-off cologne. Go on home. Pour yourself a glass of your best poison and enjoy your own company. So what if you don’t have a date on Valentine’s…A few weeks from now, those roses’ll be wilted anyway.

About tonight’s guest writers:

Ian Lazoda: When he can be dragged away from tweeting about hockey, horse racing and other mischief (@ianlozada), Ian’s usually halfheartedly hiding behind a camera somewhere.

Melinda Meservy: Melinda is a hamster in the corporate wheel by day and lover of music, travel and all things flora whenever else. Her border collie looks after her home and taxes in Salt Lake, while Melinda lives the expat life in London. She has a date this Valentine’s Day.