This is it, my friends — the end of Week Boy-Ar-Dee:
It’s been a bumpy road, to be sure, but an educational one nonetheless. We’ve learned, for instance, that it’s possible to can the taste of soggy nachos, or to take the worst parts of the flavor of pepperoni pizza and inject them into ravioli. Most importantly, I’ve learned never to eat anything made by Chef Boyardee again.
But first, the Cheesy Burger Ravioli.
The Boy was all hopped up for this one. He and his mom were gone this morning, and as soon as they came back, he was asking me when we’d be having lunch:
“DID YOU MAKE THE CHEF BOY-AR-DEE YET? WHICH ONE ARE WE HAVING TODAY? I WONDER WHAT IT WILL TASTE LIKE!”
Initial appearances were encouraging: It looked like ravioli because, I mean, it’s ravioli. There were no awful smells, no strange floaters, nothing to cause undue concern regarding malignant after-effects. And you know what? It actually smells pretty good when you cook it.
Doesn’t taste bad either. This is due mainly to the fact that it doesn’t taste anything like a cheesy burger — flavor-wise, it’s pretty much just meat ravioli — but I’m not complaining. I’d been worried that this would be the worst of the bunch, so its relative edibility (is that a word?) was a really nice surprise.
Unfortunately, The Boy didn’t agree with me. He took one bite and cocked his head a little, like he couldn’t quite decide what he was tasting; then, after swallowing, he (somewhat bravely, I thought) speared another ravioli and put it in his mouth. After chewing a few times, he decided he’d tasted enough: His cheeks bulged out, his face turned red, and he started making a bunch of loud noises.
“You like it,” I said. He shook his head wildly. “Yep,” I said. “It’s the best one.”
So he went to the chalkboard we have hanging on the kitchen wall and wrote:
In case it isn’t legible, it reads “THIS IS THE WORST.”
Kind of a sour note for Week Boy-Ar-Dee to go out on, I guess, but those are the breaks. What it basically comes down to is that if I’m ever held at gunpoint and forced to choose between these four lunch products, I’m going for the Cheesy Burger Ravioli. But gunpoint is pretty much what it’ll take.
Cheesy Burger Ravioli
The Boy: “THIS IS THE WORST.”
jefito: “Hey! Tastes like ravioli!”
overall score: 3 out of 5