10 of the Strangest Officially Licensed Beatles Products Ever

Long before Kiss set the gold standard in licensing their band (brand?) to death, the Beatles were the kings of merchandise. And while some Beatles products made sense — pins, wigs, lunch boxes, posters, and the like — there was some really odd stuff sold using the Fab Four’s likeness. Here are ten such items, in no particular order.

#1. Ringo Starr Bubble Bath Doll

Beatles Ringo Starr Bubble Bath Doll (Colgate, 1965)

How do you make a creepy plastic Ringo even more creepy? Unscrew his head and bathe in his gooey innards!

#2. Official Lariat Tie

Beatles Official Lariat Tie (Seltaeb, 1964)

You say it’s a lariat tie, I say it’s a shoelace with a pin on it. And since when were the Beatles known for wearing lariats anyway?

#3. Lesson Assignment Pad

Beatles Lesson Assignment Pad

Because nothing else exemplifies the spirit of youthful rebellion like making sure all of your schoolwork is carefully and neatly documented.

#4. With the Beatles Talcum Powder

With the Beatles Talcum Powder (Margo of Mayfair, 1964)

Ladies! If the mere thought of being near John Lennon makes you sweat, have I got the perfect product for you…

#5. Beatle Twig

Beatle Twig (c. 1964)

So this is literally just a pair of wooden sticks and a pair of propellers with the word “Beatles” on them. Only you and the Beatles know how it’s done, but no one knows what the point is.

#6. Silk Handkerchief

Beatles-Themed Silk Handkerchief - Green and Gold (1964)

What better way to show your love of all things Beatle than to wipe your snot all over the boys’ faces? But at least you’ll have something to clutch when you leave your parents’ home.

#7. Cellophane Tape

Beatles Cellophane Tape

This is just so completely random that I can’t even think of a joke for it. Feel free to have at it in the comments.

#8. Long Eating Licorice Records

Beatles Licorice Box of Record Candies (Five) (UK, Circa 1963)

Bonus points for clever packaging, minus points for this being nothing more then giant wheels of licorice. Yuck.

#9. Insect Repellent Mothballs

Beatles Mothball Insect Repellent

Two of the weirdest products on this list — this one and the tape — are from the Philippines. I know relatively little about that country, other than that they find very strange ways to express their fandom.

#10. Carefree Nylon Stockings

Beatles Carefree Nylon Stockings

Actually, I rather like these.

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Chris Holmes
Chris Holmes joined the Popdose writing staff only after enduring a humiliating series of hazing rituals. One day he'll write a tell-all book, and then they'll all pay. Until then, you can also catch him at his regular home, The Man in the Gray Flannel Suit, or you can follow him
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