Posts Tagged ‘Howard Stern’

CHART ATTACK!: 4/22/72

Happy Friday, everyone, and welcome back to CHART ATTACK! This is a pretty solid, diverse week on the charts: six out of our ten artists are black, and the other four are, like, the whitest artists in the world. They’re all a part of April 22, 1972!

10. Doctor My Eyes — Jackson Browne Amazon iTunes
9. A Cowboy’s Work is Never Done — Sonny & Cher Amazon iTunes
8. Heart of Gold — Neil Young Amazon iTunes
7. Day Dreaming — Aretha Franklin Amazon iTunes
6. Betcha By Golly, Wow — The Stylistics Amazon iTunes
5. In the Rain — The Dramatics Amazon iTunes
4. A Horse With No Name — America Amazon iTunes
3. I Gotcha — Joe Tex Amazon iTunes
2. Rockin’ Robin — Michael Jackson Amazon iTunes
1. The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face — Roberta Flack Amazon iTunes

10. Doctor My Eyes — Jackson Browne

I’ve never really paid much attention to Jackson Browne, but I really, really like this song. I love the piano with the stuck key at the beginning. I love David Crosby’s backing vocals (and I didn’t know until now that Nash was on there as well). I love the percussion, and I love the guitar work. And of course I love the bass playing — it’s frickin’ Lee Sklar! Who doesn’t love Lee Sklar?

This was Browne’s debut single from his debut album, and his only entry in the Top 10 until 1982’s “Somebody’s Baby” (which was his last). The song was covered — and this totally baffles me — by the Jackson 5 almost instantly, appearing on their 1972 album Lookin’ Through the Windows. The “baby, baby” opening kind of sucks, but Michael sounds great.

The Jackson 5 — Doctor My Eyes (download)

9. A Cowboy’s Work is Never Done — Sonny & Cher

Let me just play you something. Here’s the opening of “A Cowboy’s Work is Never Done.”

Got it? Okay, now listen to this.

Am I crazy?

Peaking at #8, this incredibly stupid song was (thankfully) the last Top 10 hit for Sonny & Cher. And you know what sucks more than this song? This song’s video. Watch Sonny Bono play air guitar. It’s terrible.

8. Heart of Gold — Neil Young

Neil Young has only had one #1 single in his career. This is it. And it’s his only song to crack the Top 30 as well. I think it’s safe to say that Neil Young is a failure. I’m sure he’d agree.

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Dw. Dunphy On… Pay-to-Play, the 21st-Century Way

Get out your wallet — or, better yet, don’t: The music subsidiary industries of live venue ticket sales and satellite radio are here to give you a lesson in economics. It was news recently when ticket agent monolith Ticketmaster shuttled consumers seeking Bruce Springsteen tour tickets immediately to a “secondary arm,” which in this case means aftermarket, or, to be more blunt, scalping. The turnaround from viable public sale to resale was an estimated 15 seconds, an impossible speed for the average concertgoer to have broken through to obtain tickets. The whiff of stink indicates that Ticketmaster concocted this scam to get the tickets immediately to the secondary market, where they could charge whatever the market would bear. 100 percent markup? 500 percent markup?

Springsteen wasn’t at all happy about it and made his displeasure public. Afterward, a whole raft of complaints came in, not just for the Springsteen incident but for Britney Spears tickets, summer festival tickets, and a whole host of gouged events. Wouldn’t any other company out there compete head-to-head with Ticketmaster to bring tickets back down to the common strata? Well, maybe LiveNation would be our savior! Well, sure, until it was announced that LiveNation was seeking to merge with Ticketmaster, forming what could only be described as a monopoly on the ticket agency market. Pre-merger, we have seen even modest summer events ticketed at a starting rate of $100 for nosebleed seating. What the post-merger business holds in store is just about unthinkable, and in a poor economy where such entertainment distractions would be welcomed, this seems like a suicidal business practice.

Well, if we can’t rely on businesses to be responsible, or at the very least realistic, we can expect the US government to intercede and not allow such shifty unions to take place, if only for the sake of the public trust, right? Think back to the days when our governance said things like, “We cannot allow XM Satellite Radio to merge with Sirius. They’re the only game in town. To wed them is to subject their customers to all manner of pricing abuses.” Not long thereafter, the two joined forces anyway because, in matters such as these, the merger almost always goes through. And now it looks like XM/Sirius is on the brink of bankruptcy. Are these events related?

Back in the infancy of satellite radio, there was a cry of disdain — how can you expect the public to buy into paying for radio after having free access for years? Signal quality is a selling point and, undeniably, digital radio sounds a lot better than standard airwave broadcasting. Censorship is another point, in that because you pay for the usage, you assume the liability of offense, so the codes of “morality and decency” are waived, much like cable television. This was a big plus for Howard Stern, one of the first truly big stars to gravitate to satellite. He famously berated the fans who refused to follow him over, calling them all manner of slurs now that the station he was on (being his very own) would never muzzle him. (more…)

DVD Review: “Son of the Beach, Volume 2″

In the annals of television history, Son of the Beach will not go down as a classic show — and I don’t mean that as an insult to comedian Tim Stack or the funny show that he created with David Morgasen and James R. Stein.  And from listening to the audio commentaries throughout the Volume 2 DVD box set just released by Shout! Factory and Fox, you get the feeling that they’d be the first to admit the same thing.  That said, Son of the Beach certainly was fun, in a juvenile, boys’ locker room way, which makes sense since it was co-produced by Howard Stern.  Moreover, it was popular enough to warrant three seasons on FX between 2000 and 2002.  The Volume 2 box collects 21 episodes, the last seven from season 2 and all of season 3.

Set in the coastal town of Malibu Adjacent, CA, Son of the Beach follows the exploits of Natch Johnson (Stack), lifeguard extraordinaire and leader of SPF 30, his team of lifeguards sworn to project the beaches.  The crew includes B.J. Cummings (Jaime Bergman), the hot, airhead blonde, Chip Rommel (Roland Kickinger) a musclebound bodybuilder with a thick German accent, Jamaica St. Croix (Leila Arcieri), the sassy, no nonsense urban chick, and Kimberlee Clark (Kimberly Oja), the smart girl next door who feels her calling is in lifeguarding, not curing the world’s diseases.  Together, they have outlandish adventures that would be pointless to describe because most of the episodes are merely making fun of plots from other television shows or movies.  But no one watches Son of the Beach for deep thoughts; it’s essential viewing for the bikini-clad hot babes and the double entendres and gross-out jokes that fly by a mile a minute.

As with anything associated with Howard Stern, nothing is sacred.  Race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, the handicapped — all are fair game.  You may find yourself cringing at some of the off-color jokes, but in a way, the show is merely carrying on the tradition of All in the Family and Blazing Saddles, which used humor subversively to make the audience reflect on their own prejudices.  Son of the Beach in no way reaches the stature of those two examples; however, you still may find yourself laughing hard then questioning yourself after the fact.  Morgasen, Stack and Stein were after the quick laugh, no matter what, but they were clever enough to slip a little social commentary into a show or two. (more…)

CHART ATTACK!: 11/24/84

Hey everybody!  Just think: one week from now, you’ll probably be feeling full and somewhat nauseous from all the food you’ve ingested.  I say, why wait a week?  Get that nauseous feeling right now as we tackle the Billboard Top 10 from November 24, 1984!

10.  I Just Called to Say I Love You  — Stevie Wonder Amazon iTunes
9.  Penny Lover — Lionel Richie Amazon iTunes
8.  All Through the Night — Cyndi Lauper Amazon iTunes
7.  Strut — Sheena Easton Amazon iTunes
6.  Caribbean Queen (No More Love on the Run) — Billy Ocean Amazon iTunes
5.  Better Be Good to Me — Tina Turner Amazon iTunes
4.  Out of Touch — Daryl Hall and John Oates Amazon iTunes
3.  I Feel For You — Chaka Khan Amazon iTunes
2.  Purple Rain — Prince and the Revolution Amazon iTunes
1.  Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go — Wham! Amazon iTunes

10. I Just Called to Say I Love You — Stevie Wonder

I’m sorry. I know it’s cliché, but I have to.

It’s funny ’cause it’s true! There are, sadly, a lot of people out there who think of this song when they think of Stevie Wonder, and seriously, that pains me. You know who I’m talking about. You probably work with them.

Barry asks another important question here: “Is it, in fact, unfair to criticize a formerly great artist for his latter day sins?” No, it’s not. Stevie Wonder may be a musical genius, but it doesn’t mean I have to love everything he’s ever released. “I Just Called to Say I Love You” is actually a well-written song. It’s poppy, it’s catchy, and the sentiment is simple, yet original. However, none of this changes the fact that this is song comes nowhere near the caliber of his work from the ’70s. And I’m still on the fence as to whether I give him credit or points off for the cha-cha-cha ending.

When I hear this song today (and I try not to), this is what I usually think about:

9. Penny Lover — Lionel Richie (download)

When you’re on fire like Lionel Richie in 1984, you can do whatever the hell you want.  You can write a song called “Penny Lover,” which is not actually about somebody who loves pennies, or even about someone who loves girls named Penny.  And you can sit back and watch your song reach the Top 10, without batting an eye.  That being said, “Penny Lover” peaked at #8 and thus became Richie’s lowest-charting solo single to date.  This doesn’t seem so bad until you realize that he co-wrote the song with his wife, Brenda, and you just know that Lionel got the shit kicked out of him for that one.  “You write a song with ‘Tam bo li de say de moi ya” and it goes to #1, but my song stalls at #8?  Go outside and find me a switch!”

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