Rock Court, Small Claims Division: Stiff Little Fingers v. U2

All rise.

The rules of this courtroom are simple. You will be presented with two songs, one by the plaintiff and one by the defendant. It is your task to decide if the defendant’s track is only coincidentally similar to the plaintiffs or, as members of the Bar Association put it, whaddya take us for? Maroons?! You have been duly instructed.

Today’s docket: Stiff Little Fingers, plaintiffs vs. U2, defendants in a Belfast versus Dublin showdown!

Stiff Little Fingers – “Johnny Was” from Inflammable Material (1979)

Those stinky repeat offenders cribbed our groove! U2? What, is that a declaration of who’ll they’ll rip off next? BEGORRAH!!

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U2 – “Seconds” from War (1983)

Your honor, this is harassment! We have a military rhythm and a riff. They have a military rhythm and a riff. Apart from that, it’s all blarney. BLARNEY!!

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