Song Title: “Somebody Save Me”
Album: Night Songs
Release Date: Aug. 2, 1986

Why You Remember Them: Rode to fame by digging fingernails deep into Bon Jovi’s coattails in the post-Slippery When Wet epoch.

Worldwide Total Album Sales To Date: 18 million

How You Can Tell This Cinderella From The Cartoon Princess On Google: Be sure to click on “Cinderella * Rock N Roll.” Pretty much everything else is wicked Disney.

Other Key Tracks: “Shake Me,” “Don’t Know What You Got Till It’s Gone”

Humiliating Personal Memory: I dubbed (high-speedly, like I even have to say that) this tape from a friend’s brother in Upland, Ind., in 1986. The song that came after “Somebody Save Me” was called “In from the Outside,” and I was briefly obsessed with “In from the Outside,” except the extended prog-rock outro thing. Whatevs.

Unlikely Appearance in Post-Nirvana World: Somehow landed the track “Hot and Bothered” on the soundtrack to Wayne’s World.

Best Part Of Their Wikipedia Entry: Pretty straightforward actually; not a lot of throwing flaming whiskey bottles around or pushing pianos out of hotel room windows here. Wait, here’s something: Kenny Aronoff furnished drums on the band’s fourth album, Still Climbing.

Estimated Number of Greatest Hits Collections: 5
Most Recent Greatest Hits Collection Title: Rocked, Wired and Bluesed

Estimated Number Of Live Albums: 6, counting imports (!)
Most Alarming Live Album Title: Extended Versions

Sweet Christ, They Actually Covered: “Blue Christmas,” a gift from singer Tom Keifer to the Monster Ballads Xmas CD in December 2007.

Most Improbable Song Title: “Bad Attitude Shuffle.” Indicates both a degree of wild youthful abandon and impaired mobility. Honorable Mention: “Bad Seamstress Blues/Fallin’ Apart at the Seams.”

Pre-Nirvana Song Titles: “Hell On Wheels,” “Shake Me”

Post-Nirvana Song Titles: “Through The Rain,” “Blood From A Stone”

Arbitarily Scored Ferocity of Devil-Horns Thrust: 7. “Somebody Save Me” rules, in part.

Looking Ahead: Cinderella was forced to scrap a 2008 tour with Warrant and Lynch Mob when singer Tom Keifer’s left vocal cord hemorrhaged. Cinderella’s message board says Keifer’s voice is now back to normal; the band is rumored to have 2009 festival dates lined up.

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