Love stinks. Trying to get to love stinks more.

Here’s the deal: there’s a woman I’ve been interested in. I only cross her path every other weekend, but she’s always been sweet and kind when I’ve had time to talk to her. Briefly, really briefly. Did I mention she’s gorgeous? Yeah, she’s gorgeous, but here’s the kicker. She doesn’t seem to know that, and if she does, she doesn’t act like it, which makes her gorgeouser. (Oh, cut me some slack, will ya?)

Anyway, I’ve been mulling over in my head how I’m to try to get to know her. I’d like to impress her, of course, but I also don’t want to come off as creepy and kill off whatever minuscule opportunity I might have. Being a music nerd, I thought, “Go with your strength and make her a mix CD. You can try to find out about her by offering a little about yourself.” So I made the mix CD… that I will never give her.

Putting aside the rose-tinted romantic flush and just staring at the situation pragmatically, nothing is quite as off-putting as someone just immediately offering up gifts. In this situation, homemade gifts are even worse because you’ve really put your heart and some thought into it. The premise that I’ve been thinking about her then sounds less like good-natured pining and more like obsessing. Not a promising opening serve.

Also, mixtapes are something you give once you actually kind of know a person. You’re aiming at targets they’ve disclosed, you know their likes and dislikes and you’re trying to create a mix within those boundaries. This whole thing of a getting-to-know-you item is like jumping from no dates to sixth date status. How rude.

So I decided to put it out to you, good Popdose readership. That was a lot of work to simply ditch and start from zero, and the mix has a lot of great pop tracks, although perhaps my fatalism shines through once too often in the choices. Either way, I’ve completely disavowed the project and it’s well intentioned, if awkward, basis for existing. Maybe she’ll throw me a sign next time I see her. Maybe not. I certainly doubt she reads our site…


The contents of this megamix are: The Ravines – Dark Clouds / Sugarbomb – What A Drag / The Format – Oceans / Jellyfish – I Wanna Stay Home / Beagle – Well, It’s Only Pain / Squeeze – It’s Over / Edin-Adahl – Falling / Spoon – Everything Hits At Once / The 77’s – Film At 11 / Jon Brion – Meaningless / The New Pornographers – Go Places / Paul Steel – Cry Away

The Getting-to-Know-You Megamix download

About the Author

Dw. Dunphy

Dw. Dunphy is a writer, artist, and musician. For Popdose he has contributed many articles that can be found in the site's archives. He also writes for New Jersey Stage,, Ultimate Classic Rock, and Diffuser FM. His music can be found at

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