Section 1: The Ass End

Joe Diffie
“John Deere Green” 1993, #69 (11 weeks) (download)
“Third Rock from the Sun” 1994, #84 (9 weeks) (download)
“Pickup Man” 1994, #60 (5 weeks) (download)
“So Help Me Girl” 1995, #84 (7 weeks) (download)

Before I met my wife I would have had no idea what these tunes were but now they are very familiar. She tells me that “Third Rock from the Sun” is one of her favorite songs to line dance to. And don’t underestimate the power of John Deere to turn on a country girl. In the tractor world a John Deere is like working with a Porsche while everyone else has a broken down Yugo. The color green itself is clearly made with pheromones or something as county women seem to cream themselves over it. It doesn’t quite make sense to me but I’m sure my desire to collect colored pieces of vinyl doesn’t make sense to most people too.

Digable Planets
“9th Wonder (Blackitolism)” 1994, #80 (7 weeks) (download)

I think Digable Planets were a little too intelligent for their own good at points. They were a pretty fantastic rap group that didn’t really catch on beyond “Rebirth of Slick” possibly because they were just a little fucking weird. Not like I understood half the lyrics on that tune but go to the follow up album with the odd name, Blowout Comb and you get tracks like “Highing Fly,” “The Art of Easing” and of course the curious “Dial 7 (Axioms of Creamy Spies).” Critics loved both their albums and they were quite good looking back at them now but still pretty hard for the average hip-hop fan to relate to their oddball nature. The urban dictionary isn’t enough to understand these lyrics. You need the Harvard edition for Digable Planets’ tunes.

Celine Dion
“Think Twice” 1994, #95 (5 weeks) (download)
“Only One Road” 1995, #93 (3 weeks) (download)

I think I can sum up the collective feeling on Celine Dion with the statement my wife said as I was listening to “Think Twice.” Her unsolicited response was “this is shitty even for Celine Dion.”

I don’t think I’ve ever met a person that has admitted to me that they like Celine Dion, though it doesn’t come up in regular conversation either. However, you have to admit that she has one of the best voices in the world and to write a song for her that got released as a single pretty much meant mucho buckaroonies. She did win four Grammys and two Oscars so she did something right. There’s points where she seems like a diva (and she has the right to be) and points where she seems to be down to earth.

Interestingly enough, while my wife clearly didn’t think much of “Think Twice” – that was her first #1 in the UK and the song that broke her to that audience. To each their own I suppose.

Celine hasn’t released a new record since 2007 and honestly may not ever need to release another one as her four year stay in Vegas (lasting through 2014) is one of the top grossing shows on the strip.

Dis ‘N’ Dat
“Freak Me Baby” 1995, #60 (18 weeks) (download)

Typical mid-90s boot knockin’ southern rap featuring the two groups you really know from this sound, 95 South and the 69 Boyz.

Dixie Chicks
“I Can Love You Better” 1998, #77 (7 weeks) (download)
“Wide Open Spaces” 1998, #41 (20 weeks) (download)
“Tonight the Heartache’s On Me” 1999, #46 (16 weeks) (download)

Any one of my regular readers will know that there’s no way in hell that I would have ever actually liked the Dixie Chicks. But long before Natalie Maines opened her mouth and destroyed the group, I had a huge crush on her. All three ladies were/are very sexy but Natalie was the one that I wanted. Then she started ranting about George Bush and all of a sudden music barely mattered and it was all about politics. Rightfully so, in 2007/2008 the Dixie Chicks took a step back and a little break to remove themselves from the spotlight. Personally, they can say anything they want, that’s what freedom of speech is for but it’s a shame that her rants tore the group apart as they had the potential to be one of the greatest country artists of all time the way they were going.

DJ Company
“Rhythm Of Love” 1997, #53 (19 weeks) (download)

Eurodance!!!!!!

Man, I just discovered the greatest thing in the world in the Eurodance Encyclopedia. Now I can verify if these groups are considered Eurodance or not. DJ Company was pretty easy to figure out though. Behind the scenes the company were three German producers. On stage they were January Ordu singing and Michael Fielder and Brian Thomas listed only as dancers.

Jazzy Jeff & Fresh Prince
“I’m Looking For the One (To Be with Me)” 1993, #79 (7 weeks) (download)

Included here even though they had dropped the “DJ” at the beginning at this point in their career. It’s also the point where they tried to be somewhat series and while I like most of their hits, “I’m Looking For the One” was incredibly weak.

DJ Miko
“What’s Up” 1994, #58 (20 weeks) (download)

Yeah, this is a cover of the 4-Non Blondes tune which half the world seems to detest. Weirdly enough I kind of like this version better. From what I know about the tune, even though it sounds like Linda Perry singing, it’s actually a British lady named Louise Gard doing the uncanny impression.

DJ Quik
“Tonite” 1991, #49 (9 weeks) (download)
“Jus Lyke Compton” 1992, #62 (11 weeks) (download)
“Safe + Sound” 1995, #81 (10 weeks) (download)

Personally I’m surprised at three tunes from DJ Quik showing up here. He’s mainly a producer and was part of the west coast sound but I always seem to falsely link him up with NWA and the bands on Ruthless record. Quik was on profile and while he never became the superstar rapper he fit in pretty nicely with the times and is still releasing albums.

DJ Taz
“That’s Right” 1997, #51 (20 weeks) (download)

A little shitty southern booty shaking music here courtesy of Atlanta rapper DJ Taz with Raheem the Dream.