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On the 25th day of the 12th month of 2012, the Six-Tongued Hellgoat was summoned to rise from the ashes and bring darkness to this place called POPdose. Join him in his quest.

Don’t forget to listen to the “(Love Theme) from the Six-Tongued Hellgoat” (download) created by Skull Incision, as you read along. And follow him on twitter @The_Hellgoat

This week, the Hellgoat reaches into the “mailbag” to answer some questions from fans;

Q: Who’s doing the writing for the Hellgoat?
A: The Hellgoat does all the writing himself. He also writes in third person, which is probably why people think someone is writing for him. He does this because he can see his name in writing more often. The Hellgoat reads and writes English but has yet to speak the language. He only bleats.

Q: I call bullshit on the burning saliva thing.
A: That’s not really a question but if you’d like to come closer, the Hellgoat can drool on you a bit and let you find out first hand. Bring ointment.

Q: I saw that you drive a Pontiac Firebird. Why choose that car?
A: It’s badass. And there never was a Pontiac Hellfire.

Q: May I have your babies?
A: You understand that means you’re having sex with a goat, right? Sure, send me a tweet. @The_Hellgoat.

Ritual Thrust into the Profane Maw of Churning Filth

Diamond DawnAlbum: Diamond Dawn, Overdrive
Label: Frontiers
Release: February 26, 2013
Genre: AOR!
Ranking: 10/10

Diamond Dawn’s debut record may actually be the only album like it that you will hear in 2013. We all know that the trend is to go retro these days. Most bands have harkened back to the late ’70s or very early ’80s to create a modern yet haze filled throwback record. Other band (which you also might have heard on Frontier records) are made up of members that had hit records in the ’80s and continue to make similar music as they did in 1983 except that it boasts some more modern techniques. Diamond Dawn is a whole different beast altogether.

This six-piece band formed in 2011 and just by looking at their group photo, are simply way too young to have been in an ’80s band that would have created anything close to arena rock. But here these guys are creating an album that in no way, shape or form gives the listener any impression that they gave a shit about being anything close to current. Officially these guys are labeled as “Melodic Hard Rock” but make no mistake, they are creating mid-80s AOR, without any shame in doing so. And they shouldn’t have any shame either because the album kicks ass.

The Hellgoat expected to make fun of this record when he first heard it but the reality is that while most bands that try anything close to this produce really cheesy or simply terrible material, every track on this record is well crafted, extremely tuneful and a blast to listen to. Every song is filled with hooks that don’t end, fantastic soloing and Niklas Arkbro’s work on the keys sound like he was using one of Jonathan Cain’s old models (and speaking of that, the ballad “Don’t Walk Away” could have been a Bad English tune without a doubt). If they went analog on this baby, you’d absolutely never know you weren’t listening to an obscure band from the eighties. And if this had been released in 1985, Diamond Dawn would have been a major hit and opened for Europe. And I totally mean major hit.

The Hellgoat would completely believe you if you said you still had doubts whether this was worth your time but don’t sleep on this record. There’s no scenario where he can picture this being a hit album in the US but there’s a niche of 40-year old dudes in vintage Survivor shirts and drunk 22-year old coeds that will probably eat this up.

Most Hellacious Moment: The whole damn thing. Overdrive is the Hellgoat’s third perfect 10 in 2013 (along with Corsair and Bloody Hammers)

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Somnolent Regurgitation of the Scrolls of Proselytism
(The Hellgoat wishes to convert you to the ways of the metal. But he prefers to let the press release and bio do most of the talking on these nefarious black circles.)

Album: Mothership, Mothership
Label: Ripple Music
Release: February 12, 2013
Genre: Southern Sludge Rock

Press: 70’s-tinged U.S. hard rock with a sound that satisfies like a steaming hot stew of UFO and Iron Maiden, blended with the southern swagger of Molly Hatchet and ZZ Top, Mothership’s goal from the beginning has been to carry on the tradition of the classic rock style; updated and amped up for the modern day. Originally self-released in 2012, Mothership and Ripple Music have joined forces to re-release this stunning debut record on CD and LP.

The Hellgoat’s take, 9/10: Forget the Iron Maiden reference above but UFO, Molly Hatchet etc – the Hellgoat is down with that. It’s sludgy, psychedelic and a riff fest. The Hellgoat can definitely see these guys opening up for some classic rock band in the future.

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Album: Lifeless, Godconstruct
Label: FDA Rekotz
Release: March 1, 2013
Genre: Death Metal

Press: Death Metal undeads Lifeless have finished the work on their long awaited second album, Godconstruct. The follow-up to the band’s 2008 debut, Beyond the Threshold of Death, contains 11 new stunning and catchy pure classic Death Metal hymns deep from the crypts of Germany, which will crawl into your rotten ears and devour you from the inside out.

The Hellgoat’s take, 9/10: The Hellgoat really likes this record. This is a headbanger from start to finish showing off skilled guitarists and creative writing to prevent them from sounding like every other death metal band. Godconstruct is definitely a disc to own and get batshit crazy to.

Album: Incantation, Diabolical Conquest
Label: Hells Headbangers
Release: January 26, 2013
Genre: Death Metal

Press: An unheralded classic returns: Incantation’s monumental and mesmerizing Diabolical Conquest sees its long-awaited release on vinyl! A unique, transitory period for Incantation, 1998’s Diabolical Conquest featured Daniel Corchado from The Chasm on vocals and bass, altogether lending an otherworldly and (yes) diabolical feel to the proceedings. Elsewhere, Incantation take the slithering undercurrents of the preceding Mortal Throne of the Nazarene to new heights/depths, dragging the listener through an existential muck ‘n’ murk that transcends “death metal” as a definition and into a Beyond where only sinister vibrations rule the psychic wasteland. Forever coiling and roiling like the ancient Ouroboros, Incantation’s Diabolical Conquest is an experience unto itself, and one well worth investigating on this exclusive vinyl edition!

The Hellgoat’s take, 8/10: The press blurb says it all really. A 1998 release that is both raw and sounds way ahead of its time. And it’s on the Hellgoat’s favorite – colored vinyl!

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Album: Devourment, Conceived In Sewage
Label: Relapse Records
Release: February 19, 2013
Genre: Brutal Death Metal

Press: Throughout Devourment’s seventeen years of existence, one thing has remained constant: unyielding brutality. Formed in 1995 and hailing from Dallas, Texas, Devourment has remained consistent and powerful throughout several reformations, leading many to celebrate them as the heaviest death metal band in the world due to their influential blend of vicious slam elements with an old school death metal sound. The band’s current lineup includes Mike Majewski (vocals), Ruben Rojas (guitar), Chris Andrews (bass), and Erik Park (drums).

The Hellgoat’s take, 8.5/10: The Hellgoat is the first to admit that Brutal Death Metal doesn’t do very much for him…usually. But Conceived in Sewage might just be the record to make him perk his pointy ears up a little more. This record is cannonball to the midsection, simply fierce and pummeling in every aspect.

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About the Author

The Six-Tongued Hellgoat

A goat warrior burnt by the fires of the master.

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